Wednesday, September 4, 2013

If you are going to stink at something... Stink Good!

Why do we tell kids, or anyone for that matter, that they stink at something?

If I let others dictate the way I see myself and paint my self portrait from that, I may be doing the same thing.

I have gone through 3 years of watching my son play hockey and of course suffered every emotion that he has gone through. And while I use to get frustrated when he either didn't listen to the coach or me on tactics to be better and perhaps now and again had a "bad" game or practice, I now know he doesn't stink bad those days... he stinks good!

The very thought that we know what stinks and doesn't stink when it comes to doing anything other than what we are doing is very peculiar to me now.  If I am not the Quarterback on the football field, the Goalie in net, the Pitcher on the mound, the designer of the computer or the garbage man in my alley, why do I have the right to tell someone they stunk today or they are doing it wrong?

Perhaps it is an extension of our need to be right, or at least our ego's need. Perhaps there are things we wish to improve at and it is easier to criticize to others.

Only that individual knows if they played well, just as I know if I had a good workout, a good session with a client or a good conversation with a friend. Only I know if I was all there or not.

I watched my son come off the ice the other day, looking a little rejected and thought at first to ask what did you do wrong or try to tell him how he could have done better but all I said was, "You were awesome!" and told him how much I loved watching him play. With just that his whole demeanor changed.

Then I asked him why he seemed upset and he went on to tell me what I already knew, he didn't have the best practice ever and wished he did things a little different. So I said, "Then you Stunk Good today!"

"I Stunk Good?" he laughed.

"Yeah you Stunk Good because you learned from your mistakes. You can only stink bad if you don't learn anything or blame it on someone else."

I could have easily told him what he did wrong or how to do it better but to let him know that I enjoyed watching him play and that we can only learn from our mistakes gave him something to think about other than he wasn't good at a sport he loved to play for just one day.

Imagine if we walked around without criticism and enjoyed a persons highs and lows rather than beating them down after a bad day... It just might start to change the world.

Health and Happiness!


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Bill Busch
Certified MAT Specialist
Still Motion Fitness LLC