Thursday, August 14, 2014

The rest of those who have gone before us cannot steady the unrest of those to follow

"The rest of those who have gone before us cannot steady the unrest of those to follow." 

We all grieve for those that go before us and we all must cope with their loss in our own way.  In the case of suicide, some grieve by calling those people cowards and some grieve by saying they had a disease. Some of us just walk around stunned for the rest of our lives just not understanding or tying to figure it all out and some take up the quest to help those in need and become suicide prevention advocates.

When it is all said and done we all will follow a path that helps us get through this thing we know as life the best way we know how.

I posted this on Face Book several times: BE KIND… For everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about! Simple advice, yet so hard to follow through with as our ego’s get in the way and think we know what is best… especially for everyone else.

I cannot possibly understand what each and everyone of my friends or family go through when there is a loss or a tragedy that happens in their lives, even if I am standing right next to them as it happened.

Dr. Wayne Dyer, explains that “Quantum Moments” are moments that occur in your life that create a shift from an ego driven life to that of a spiritual awakening of one’s self. To me a “Quantum Moment” is one that you have that feels like it could have happened yesterday, whether it was painful or joyful it sticks with you and you find your life directed by it.

In the case of loss, one of my “Quantum Moments” in life was when my father died in our home with all of his family surrounding him. We all heard and saw his last breath. I heard his last heart beat, but I cannot presume to know what each and everyone in the room felt or how they have coped with that memory for the last 18 years… to me it was as if it happened yesterday and I grieve his loss every day, especially while I see my young son grow up without a grandfather who I am certain would have showered him with love.

The same can be said of the phone call I received the day I found out my friend Scott took his own life. I was numb with pain and have spent the last 6 years trying to understand. Again, I cannot presume to understand what his wife Teresa, his kids, Kara and Emily or any other family or close friend of Scott’s must feel. Nor can I tell them how they should feel or how they should have managed their lives since.

In the wake of the tragic death of Robin Williams... each and every one of us deals with life in the best way that we can. We may not agree on how the other person is dealing with it but for me, now more than ever, I feel as if compassion, understanding and forgiveness trump any other means of coping with loss, tragedy or just plain trying to get through the every day grind of life.

Health and Happiness!